siren-sound's Diaryland
Diary
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Big Sur
I was in a very overpriced hotel room in Big Sur listening to the call of turkey's. And then quickly after that someone complaining about that same turkey call. I wasn't sure why she was complaining, this was her idea and she had forced me to come with her and forced me to run the stupid marathon. Well, maybe the word "force" might be a little strong. I did have the intention of running the Big Sur marathon, but not like this.
The background to this situation had happened a year later, right after my grandfather and dog had died within 2 weeks of each other. I was just about to launch a huge endeavor with my business but had gotten totally sidetracked with all the deaths. My goal was to go to Albuquerque and unveil my new coaching program with the help of my two coaches. These two coached had kids, and I felt bad about taking them away from their family, but they agreed, and all was set. The day before I left, I had to put my 3-year-old black lab down from a ruptured disc. My already broken heart was in pieces, and my new goal was to get some warmth in New Mexico and get tanked.
2 days into the trip, there was a big auction for the event that my coaches and the remaining parts of me attended. My friend, coach helper, Kelly had bid and won. It was a bib for the Big Sur marathon, and I was thrilled for her. It was on my list of races that I wanted to do.
When we came back to the reality of home, she let me know that there was a fundraiser opportunity to do the Big Sur for only $500 for the bid. I had felt guilty for ripping her away from her family and fell into the trap that I, as her coach, should probably go with her.
It turns out, the race was awful. My heart wasn't in it, I didn't enjoy the epic views, and I was just mad. I was mad at myself for spending the money and time that I didn't have because I felt guilty for 3 minutes. I feel like I learned my lesson and now take the time to feel out the feeling without plopping down over a thousand dollars that I didn't have, (yes, over a thousand) for a fleeting feelng.
11:08 a.m. - 2019-03-07
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